The invention of the Shaku Shaku dance; a story of the gods

All of the culture and tradition humans practice today was passed down to them by the gods. Even though the gods have ceased to exist or rather have become a thing of the past since the great war between humans and them (the gods) which left no connection between man and his maker; his overseer; his protector, humans continue to emulate their ways.

Many years back, at a time when time was a less understood concept, the gods lived like…gods. They lavished in their might and rejoiced in their supremacy. Although, they were gods, they were uniquely separated into different colonies. Each colony had its specialty, in which the gods belonging to were fully focused on and continually practiced. The colonies were ranked based on how widely accepted their specialties were. The highly ranked colonies included the Music and Arts, Sports, Science and Technology, and so on.

The Music and Art gods were treated specially and differently from other gods. They were the definition of cool and anything that revolved around being stylish. They were regarded as elites and many other gods felt inferior to them. Sometimes, they displayed a mesmerizing performance of music and would complement it with remarkable dance moves, leaving their audience — other gods — awestricken. Amongst the gods, dominance was established according to whichever colony was able to capture the attention of the other gods and generate a loud applause; the highest ranked colony.

Hardly was it ever that the Music and Arts gods were not the dominant colony. They consistently delivered a smooth performance that could only ever be equaled or surpassed by their next performance(s). This was the way that the gods knew to exist. They indulged themselves in creative processes that manifested in various forms of entertainment, filling their bellies with wine. The merriment never stopped and the performances continued eternally. The only colonies that could contend with the Music and Arts gods were the Sports and Science & Technology gods respectively. Even at that, there were times when they (Music and Arts gods) would enchant the other gods with their wonderful performance such that no other colony would attempt to do anything. One of the legendary performances was when they created what is known today as trap music and the dance move known as the dab. It was an astounding performance.

It left a mark, and the gods trapped and trapped and trapped…and dabbed.

The Music and Arts gods reigned with the invention of trap music and dab. They performed it repeatedly and the other gods consumed it without protest. This went on for a long time so much that the Music and Art gods got stuck in trap music. They stopped being creative as it seemed like the other gods never got tired of hitting the dab. What they failed to know, however, was that the Sports gods were plotting a strategy to catch them unawares. The Music and Arts gods became so comfortable that they refused to come with new performances.

The Sports gods and the Science & Technology gods conjoined forces and came up with a performance that evolved into today’s gymnastics. The Science and Technology gods built a humongous maze-like structure made of ropes that contained so many dangerous things like a fully fledged titan with metal teeth, a large bowl boiling with the blood of an ogre, a congregation of fire-breathing three-legged sheep. The Sports gods performed in the maze by running/dancing/walking on the ropes with nothing but their bare butts.

It was a delight to watch.

The Music and Arts gods couldn’t contain their bewilderment as the performance went on. They were busy hitting the dab, and when they finally raised their heads they were met with the stunning performance. It was a jaw-dropping performance; the Sports gods balancing all their body weights on their butts while doing all forms of acrobatics amidst all the danger.

Can you imagine how mesmerizing such a performance is?

Let it be known that the Music and Arts gods tried everything possible to regain the attention of the other gods. They devised every means, from standing on top of one another while doing synchronized dance steps to creating what is known today as EDM (Electronic Dance Music) with nothing but high-pitched farts. All of these performances were commendable, but it wasn’t nearly as good as what the Sport gods and Science & Technology gods performed — individually or collectively. They kept shuffling the baton between themselves. The Sports gods redefined the game when they began to use planets to do hula hooping. The Science & Technology took it up a notch with the introduction of an ice-cream machine. There is no competing with that when all the gods (including the Music and Arts gods) all marveled at the wonderment of ice-cream; entering into a frenzied state as they voraciously consumed it.

At this point, the other colonies (including the Music and Arts gods) had given up trying to gain dominance or even put up any performances. It was all about ice-cream and watching the Sports gods engage in their latest performance: soccer. A round leather was kicked around in the air with the aim of slotting the ball in the net of the opponents. It was a thoughtfully created performance that was entirely sustainable. There were no rules; all that was required was to score goals. It doesn’t matter how it was done. The beauty of it was t hat there was no picking sides. The enjoyment derived from the performance lied in the action — the running around, chasing after a dumb inanimate object and setting it in motion with the foot.

[This was all carried out in the air]

The other gods cheered loudly as they watched the Sports gods played the game. The Science and Technology gods came up with an invention that counted the scores. One of the Sports gods kicked the ball (the ball was actually the skull of an obese human) so high into the air that it looked like the ball went out of the sphere of the gods, and the Sport gods chased after it. For a brief moment, the Sports gods were out of sight and none of the other gods saw whatever was happening. A deafening silence fell over the gods as they anxiously waited in anticipation. Considerable time went by and out of thin air, the Sports gods returned with the skull on fire, and almost immediately a dynamite shot was fired. The ball danced in the air as it crept past the gods and demolished the huge post that was made out of the bones of a dinosaur.

The gods were consumed by euphoria at this point. Although every day, every moment was a celebration for them, this new performance stirred in them a tempest of joy. The gods all reveled in the orgasmic moment, and a blissful event followed afterwards: The music gods started by clamoring Awon Omo Shepeteri. They all held pieces of white clothing in their hands, flipping their hands back and forth in a sophisticated gesture. They began to do a series of leg over while keeping the movement of their feet precise.

[Repeatedly, they did the dance that is today known as Shaku Shaku]

Shaku Shaku da?

In no time, the Shaku Shaku trend became a viral sensation. Pieces of white clothing all over as the gods passionately displayed the revolutionary dance.

Written by

passionately curious about the entertainment business. i’m in a deep relationship with writing. music and marketing related tings.

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